On Tuesday, I wrote a short blog on my Positively Depressed microblog that hit a nerve with some folks so I thought I’d give a little backstory here. It all started with this picture.
I used to roll my eyes when I’d hear people talk about healing their inner child. I was of the school of thought that the past is in the past and needs to stay there. I didn’t think there was any point in going back and revisiting it.
I told my counselor as much the first time I met with her. I told her, “I am not interested in rehashing the past. I am ready to move on.” I told her, in the words of Carly Simon, “I haven’t got time for the pain.” She patiently nodded her head. We began with what was going on with me in the present. Much to my dismay, within minutes we were revisiting pain from my childhood and young adult life. UUGH!
The problem with pain is unless you process it and get healing from it, it doesn’t miraculously go away. The great news is once you do, even though you will still remember it, you will not be held captive by it and it won’t hold you back from blossoming into the fragrant, most beautiful version of yourself. Of course, there is always more work to be done but digging up bitter roots that cause damage is an absolute necessity.
After a recent session – I sent my counselor the above picture. I thought she’d enjoy it since it went along with some of the things we had just talked about. I didn’t expect her to ask me to actually write out how I would nurture my little self! Yikes. It took me a good long while to be able to articulate some of the things I needed to hear. This is a summary of what I wrote.
I would tell her:
That I love her just for being her spacey, disorganized self.
That I love her – imperfections and all.
That she doesn’t have to try to fix everything.
That when she makes mistakes, I will be there to help her work through them.
That it’s ok to not feel strong sometimes and when she feels weak, I’ll be there to pick her up.
That she doesn’t have to push down her emotions but she can allow herself to feel them in order to process them.
I would tell her how proud I am of her
– just the way she is.
I realized, after reading it back to myself, this is precisely what God says to us in so many words… Knowing it is one thing, but speaking it over yourself and getting it to move from your head to your heart is quite another.
Humans do not always speak the truth our heart desperately needs to hear and if we rely on them to, we will be disappointed over and over. For those truths we need to listen to the One who created us. He loved us first, loves us still and always will.
Unconditionally.
Just like Little You needed to hear reassuring words of encouragement and love…Big You does too.
If you take the time to write out what your heart needs to hear – I’m willing to bet God has said them all to you.
I’d love to hear your feedback…♥
