Tracey Metzger – Encouragement

3 Reasons Why You May Have to Wait

May 1, 2013 / in Encouragement, Faith, Perseverance, Stress / by traceymetzger

There is nothing worse than being in limbo. I’ve been there many times it’s no fun.

You can see the “next” thing in your mind. You have already moved on mentally from where you are and being stuck there physically feels like being imprisoned.

In retrospect though, I can see that in those times there was some unfinished work that needed to be done before I moved on. Of course it’s much easier to see with hindsight.

The one thing you don’t want to do is take matters into your own hands and try to force things to happen before their time. I’ve tried that – it’s not pretty. You can read about it in this blog.

Most of the times that I have been in a prolonged waiting period it has been for one of these three reasons.

1. There was something I still needed to learn before I was ready for the “next thing”

Waiting is often a character building and testing time. It is easy to shine when we are getting exactly what we want and desire but in those times when we are waiting we are developing character that will help sustain us once we get there. Ask God to show you exactly what He wants you to learn in the limbo time.

2. Someone else needed me right where I was (and it wasn’t all about me – imagine that!?!)

It could be that you are in a holding pattern because there is someone right where you are who needs the hope that you have. Look for opportunities right where you are to finish out that season strong. I remember longing to begin FTGI and start ministering to women but I was stuck working in a job that didn’t give me much time to devote to it. Praying on my drive to work one morning I felt God whisper – start right where you are. When I got to work a young girl and I started chatting and she asked if we could meet for coffee because she thought she could learn from me. Ministry was right in front of me and I was overlooking it, anxious to move on.

3. Whatever I was moving on to was not ready for me yet.

My daughter’s adoption always comes to mind when I think of waiting. When I was “ready” to have my baby already and so “done” with the waiting, I still had a year to go. Now I know it was because she had not even been born yet. Thank God that in His providence He did not grant my wish for it to happen sooner. There is no doubt that she is my child and I would have waited even longer just for her!

Sometimes it’s one of these, sometimes two and it could be all three but know that there is something being accomplished in your waiting time and it is not in vain.

Let patience have it’s perfect work (James 1:4) One day soon you will mount up with wings and FLY!

Wait Training

April 25, 2013 / in Depression, Encouragement, Faith, Perseverance, Stress / by traceymetzger

You can’t rush God. I’ve tried.

Patience is not one of my virtues. Most people don’t like to wait but some are more impatient than others. I run with that crowd.

As much as I don’t like waiting I have come to embrace it, knowing that in those times when we feel like we are in a holding pattern, we are actually gaining something invaluable – STRENGTH.

My husband works out on a regular basis doing WEIGHT training – and sometimes he drags me along. I don’t like it, but I do it because I know that I will gain strength from it. If I choose the weight myself I usually go for the lighter, easier option. When my husband comes along he always makes me increase the amount I am lifting. He explained to me that unless I am pushing my muscles beyond their normal limitation I will not be accomplishing anything but conditioning. If I want to build muscle (strength) I have to push myself and increase the weight to a somewhat uncomfortable amount. This causes the muscle fibers to actually tear. But what happens after that is amazing. After the workout the muscles fibers heal and it is a scientific fact that they come back bigger and stronger!

There are times in my life when the WAIT training I have had to endure seemed endless and beyond my normal limitation. When all I felt was torn down and ripped apart it was hard to imagine that I would ever feel strong again. That is where patience and endurance come into play. The word of God tells us that if we are patient and endure we will receive all that we have been promised. It seems that patience is a requirement of the waiting period. In my experience, I have never been granted deliverance from a waiting period until I have learned to patiently endure.

Of course there are times in life when we have to fight for a breakthrough but more often than not I have had to wait for the breakthrough. Knowing that my heart was being strengthened in the process was a comfort.

Do you find yourself in a holding pattern? Be brave and wait patiently for the God to reveal all that He has planned for you. And in the meantime take courage that you are getting stronger every minute!

Caught in the Undertow

April 24, 2013 / in Depression, Encouragement, Faith, Fear, Perseverance, Stress, Uncategorized / by traceymetzger

I grew up on Long Island. Although I have lived on the west coast of Florida, which boasts some of the world’s most beautiful beaches for the past 20 years, Jones Beach will always be the most beautiful beach to me because it is home.

If I close my eyes I can feel the gritty sand in my toes and hear the seagulls and the waves crashing to the shore. As a little kid I would play on the shore line, building sandcastles and jumping over the remainder of the breaker waves as they rolled up towards the beach. As I got older I became more adventurous and learned how to ride the waves in as they broke.

It is an exhilarating feeling to catch a good wave at precisely the right moment and get a nice clean ride in. But occasionally you can be blindsided by a wave and get pummeled by it because you weren’t expecting it. Sometimes in an attempt to ride a wave you can jump in at the wrong time resulting in being creamed by the force of the current. This is a scary experience. In a matter of seconds you are being spun uncontrollably and it is incredibly difficult to find your bearings. It feels like the ocean is sucking you downward. If you are not accustomed to navigating the unpredictable activity of an undertow it is easy to panic. I have been caught in some crazy waves that in the moment have made me wonder if I would survive.

Fortunately like most kids who are raised by the beach, I was taught at a young age how to handle such situations and even though it could be frightening I knew that if I followed some simple rules of survival the wave would eventually subside and I would once again rise to the surface and be able to breathe.

The first rule was HOLD YOUR BREATH AND DON’T PANIC. The duration of even a huge ocean wave is shorter than the amount of time you can hold your breath. The tendency when we panic is to gasp for breath but if when the wave hits you just hold your breath and don’t panic in time the waters will smooth out and the air in your body will cause you to rise to the surface.

The second rule was DON’T FIGHT IT – GO WITH THE FLOW. Our natural reaction when we’re being knocked around and feel out of control is to fight to regain our footing but this is actually counterproductive when trying to react to a wave. All you will end up doing is completely exhausting yourself. Instead the trick is to relax your body and let yourself go with it until the wave passes. The force of the wave is far stronger than you are and fighting against it is futile. If you can calmly wait it out you will soon be released, your feet will find the ground and you will be able to push up to the surface and find your bearings. This is easier said than done when you are being tossed about by the waves!

Some kids (and grown-ups for that matter) having been pummeled by a wave once decided it was not worth the risk and do not engage in the joy of riding the waves. They didn’t learn the survival tips for managing the undertow and so they settle for just playing in the shallow breakers. They are missing out on the exhilaration of swimming in the ocean. It is an incredible feeling to be carried by the rise and fall of the ocean swells and something thrilling about playing in the vastness of the sea.

Life is often like this. A series of waves, some invigorating and awe-inspiring and others downright frightening and disorienting. But it shouldn’t stop us from engaging. If we want to experience all the joy and wonder that this life has to offer we need to pack up our coping skills and dive in deep.

crashing waves, panic, depression, coping, fear

This is not me – but what a great picture!
photo credit
Young girl in the waves, Jones Beach, New York. July 1951, by Alfred Eisenstaedt.
www.entertaininghouse.com

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Instead of playing in the shallow breakers I am ready to dive in. This is an unedited, first attempt excerpt from a short book I am writing. Stay tuned!

If you are in the swirl of an undertow please know that this too shall pass. Hold your breath (or since you are not really in the ocean – take some deep breaths) ~ don’t panic. Before you know it you will be in smooth waters once again.

He stilled the storm to a whisper; the waves of the sea were hushed. ~ Psalm 107:29

Fighting the Shame of Depression

April 10, 2013 / in Depression, Encouragement, Faith, Stress / by traceymetzger

After my first real battle with depression I was talking to the women’s pastor at my church about it. She asked me if I would share about it at an upcoming women’s conference. I knew it would be hard but I wasn’t prepared for just how hard it would be to move from the safety of a few close friends and family members knowing about my struggles to a wider group of people that I did not know very well.

The feeling of vulnerability was overwhelming. I remember when the women’s pastor announced the conference in church saying, “…and Tracey Metzger is going to share about her recent bout with depression…” I felt all the blood drain from my face. I felt dizzy and found myself wanting to run out the back door.

Now I know what that emotion was. It was shame.

Shame is similar to being embarrassed but worse. It does weird things to your body. Embarrassing – is tripping up the stairs or having toilet paper stuck on your shoe as you come out of the restroom. But shame is different.

Shame is not momentary; it takes up residence inside your heart. And you don’t want to hide for a moment – you want the earth to open up and swallow you.

My shame came from the misguided belief that if I was as strong in my faith as I professed to be that I would not suffer from depression. Somewhere I had bought into the misconception that if I just prayed enough or in the right way with enough conviction that I would be able to conquer it. Depression makes you feel like you are doing something wrong. I’ve actually heard people in Christian circles say things like, “Depression is pride turned inward” which only contributes to the fallacy that the person suffering has control over it.

Depression, when it is a result of a chemical imbalance or mental illness is debilitating and not something that someone can just snap out of. I believe that prayer helps but sometimes it helps in the form of God leading you to the right medication or doctor. There are testimonies of people that have been delivered from depression miraculously just like there are people that have had tumors disappear. But there are also people who need medication and still have rough days just like all the treatments in the world cannot treat some major illnesses.

We live in a fallen world where illness – physical, mental, emotional and spiritual abound. What we don’t need are stigmas and judgments that lead to shame.

But where sin abounds (I believe that the all of the ugliness in the world is a result of the fall of man), GRACE abounds much more. Let us pray for more and more grace so that people who are suffering will not feel ashamed and can get the help they need.

This blog was inspired by the various editorials, posts and blogs I have read in response to the passing of Rick and Kay Warren’s son. The only good that can possibly come from this is more conversation and openness about mental illnesses. Praying for abundant grace, peace and comfort for the Warrens and all who are close to them.

The Spirit of the Warrior

April 4, 2013 / in Depression, Encouragement, Faith, Fear, Grief / by traceymetzger

There is a difference between having a warrior spirit and a warring spirit.

It is true that there are times we have to battle through, but it is equally true that in this life of faith there are times when the warrior’s wisest strategy is to surrender.

Surrender in real battle means defeat but surrender in the life of faith is many times the only way to victory.

I found this out last year when I had my meltdown. I had trained myself throughout my life to war through the tough times. You know, get tougher when the going got tough.

It worked for the most part for 47 years and then I hit a wall.

It was then that I realized that the warrior in me needed to rest and allow the Spirit of the Warrior that resides within me to fight on my behalf.

It is ironic but I needed to gather all the strength I had to give myself permission to stop being so strong.

Maybe you have been fighting a battle that is not yours to fight.

Allow the Spirit of the Warrior who always wins fight for you. He has promised that He will.

As always I welcome your thoughts, comments, questions! Have a great Thursday! Friday’s coming 😉

Stop being afraid, and stop being discouraged because of this vast invasion force, because the battle doesn’t belong to you, but to God. ~ 2Chor 20:15 (ISV)

Good, Good Friday

March 29, 2013 / in Courage, Encouragement, Faith, Fear, Grief, Love, Relationships, Stress / by traceymetzger

The Son of Man came to seek and to save that which was lost. ~ Luke 19:10

What can take away our sin?

What can make us whole again?

What can dry our tears?

What can mend our broken relationships?

What can help us extend forgiveness to others?

What can heal our bodies?

What can restore our minds to sanity?

What can bring peace to a restless soul?

What can cast out fear?

What can give us courage?

What can give us strength when we are weak?

What can give us hope?

What can redeem all that is wrong in the world?

Nothing, but the blood of Jesus.

Ordinary Courage

March 25, 2013 / in Courage, Depression, Encouragement, Faith, Leadership, Perseverance, Uncategorized / by traceymetzger

Yesterday in church my pastor read a verse that I’ve probably read a thousand times before. I have read it before without any particular revelation. But this time it really spoke to me.

Acts 4:13 ~ When they saw the COURAGE of Peter and John and realized that they were unschooled, ordinary men, they were astonished and they took note that these men had been with Jesus.

This is my year to BE BRAVE and to encourage other to BE BRAVE, so every time I hear the word courage I pay attention. But “courage” was not what jumped out at me the most. What really captured my heart were the words “unschooled” and “ordinary.”

When I was melting down at the end of last year I spent some time journaling one morning trying to get to the bottom of all of the things that were bothering me. (There were quite a few!)

One of the things I was dealing with was a disconnection between my true authentic self and who I thought I needed to be in order to be worthy of my position as leader of FTGI.

So I made a list. I listed all the things I thought a leader of a faith-based women’s organization should be and I rated myself. I quickly realized that I didn’t measure up.

I won’t go into all of the items, but I listed that she (the leader) should have credentials. An education or some kind of schooling that qualified her to teach. Or maybe a master’s degree in social work, psychology or counseling…something. I went to college for a year and a half and quit.

I listed that she should have unwavering faith. I question and I doubt and I have to pray that God will help me in my unbelief…a lot. More than I think a leader should.

The list went on and although I met some of my made-up requirements overall, I fell short. As I stared at the list I heard God whisper to me that the list was mine not His. In fact He doesn’t even have a list.

He called me and that is enough.

He called Peter and John…two ordinary, unschooled men. He gave them COURAGE and that was enough to become history makers. It was enough for them to change the world and do things that astonished people!!

What has God called you to do that you feel under-qualified for? Throw your list away, have COURAGE and go change your world!

My journey to BRAVE.

January 31, 2013 / in Courage, Depression, Encouragement, Faith, Fear / by traceymetzger

A journal given to me by my sweet friend who is one brave chick!

In July of 2012 a friend and I took our girls to see the newest Disney movie. We sat chatting through the previews and then without much notice the movie started. The movie had already been playing for a few minutes when the one-word title exploded onto the screen and as it did something inside of me leapt. I know that sounds strange. It seemed strange to me also but I knew immediately that there was something significant about the word…BRAVE.

Part of my role at For the Girls International is to cast vision and lay out themes our conferences and events. When we went to see the movie we were smack dab in the middle of the planning for our 2012 conference but in that instant I knew the theme for 2013 just had to be – BE BRAVE!

What I didn’t know was that a few months from then I would experience a life event that would begin an unraveling that I could not stop no matter how hard I tried. I have been through episodes of depression in my life before but despite every effort to pull it together on my own in October of 2012, I came undone.

I didn’t realize back in July that God was about to require me to embark on a brave journey. That in order to inspire others to be brave with their lives I would first have to be brave with mine.

I have always believed that our stories are not for us to keep to ourselves but to share. We are all connected on this journey of life. I know very well that it takes time to work up the courage to share parts that may make us feel vulnerable and exposed. But it is there, in that place of transparency and vulnerability that real connection occurs. It is there that hearts heal together.

There is a time and a place for everything and I believe it is time for me to share more of my story. And my hope is that it can help someone else heal. So here’s to being brave together!

Inscription inside my journal

A little heart to heart

October 29, 2012 / in Depression, Encouragement, Faith, Grief, Rest, Uncategorized / by traceymetzger

The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures;
He leads me beside quiet waters.
He restores my soul. Psalm 23: 1-3

Can we have a little heart to heart?

It has been a crazy six weeks for me. Within that time I lost my mom and then headed straight into FTGI’s biggest event of the year, our Awaken Conference. Both events had their own brand of stress. Losing my mom was an emotional roller coaster. I was happy for her, sad for me and lots of other emotions in between. The conference (which was amazing by the way) was an emotional and spiritual high – a good kind of stress, the kind I love and crave, but stress nonetheless.

And now…

I am in need of rest. In need of renewed strength…body, soul and spirit.

So I’m waving the white flag and retreating for a little bit. I just wanted to let you know where I went. I’ll be taking a short break from blogging and other things in order to recharge. You understand, right?

We all get weary. We all lose strength at times. Thankfully we have promises to hold onto and therefore we have HOPE. You may be weary too, for your own reasons. Take heart and know that renewed strength is promised but sometimes you need to slow down long enough to grasp it. Allow Him to lead you by the quiet waters and restore your soul. That is where I will be.

He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. Isaiah 40: 28-30

I’ll be back soon…

Lots of Love,

Tracey

God has got you covered!

September 28, 2012 / in Encouragement, Faith / by traceymetzger

When life throws you a curveball it is helpful to remember that God is not surprised. He is not up in heaven observing your life, pacing heaven and wringing His hands. I had a moment a couple weeks ago when I found myself bringing the timing of my crisis to God’s attention as if He didn’t know. As if it was off His radar. And then I remembered.

The Creator of the Universe, the God that hung the stars and the moon knows every intimate detail of my life and He is right there hemming me in. I love the picture that conjures up. He surrounds me on every side and His hand is there to guide me.

Wherever you are today, take comfort in the fact that regardless of what you may be facing, He is right there with you and His right hand will guide you and hold you! Lean into Him today.

You have searched me, Lord,
and you know me.
You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.
Before a word is on my tongue
you, Lord, know it completely.
You hem me in behind and before,
and you lay your hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.

Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.

Psalm 139:1-10 (read the whole chapter here)

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