After my mom’s car accident I felt extremely vulnerable. Up until that point in my 26 year old life I had never experienced personal tragedy. Once tragedy struck, it seemed as if a huge dam that had been protectively holding back a reservoir of potential danger had broken, flooding my heart with fear.
Fear began to haunt me. If this could happen to my mom…what else could happen?
Suddenly I felt like a moving target. Potential danger surrounded me. It was as if I was a huge nerve ending sensing it everywhere I went. Frightening scenarios involving other members of my family, or myself, would make their way into my head and prevent me from falling asleep. When I allowed fear to grip me, I would feel it physically, identifying with the phrase “paralyzing fear.”
One snowy night I was getting my young boys in the car to drive to a church service. I was strapping my little guy into his car seat and without warning fear struck. In my mind’s eye I could see the article in the paper of the tragic accident involving a young family. The temptation to take my boys back in the house and tell my husband that we needed to stay home was nagging at me. But I knew that if I did, I would be surrendering to the fear.
Once we arrived and got settled into our seats the visiting speaker began to share and his topic was “Overcoming Fear” of all things! He called for those people who were struggling with paralyzing fear to come forward to the front of the room so he could pray for them. In retrospect it is easy to see the attempt to keep me from being in a service that would bring me one step closer to the peace that would replace my fear.
I still have moments of fear, however, I have never become a slave to it again because of this revelation that I had that night.
Fear is the absence of trust.
I have clung to this truth ever since. If I trust God with my life, I have nothing to fear. Not because bad things will never happen to me again but because I know that He will be with me and sustain me through whatever life brings.
I made the mistake of believing that if I held onto fear I would somehow be protecting myself against it. What I needed to believe and still need to believe everyday (preferably before breakfast!) is that when trouble comes my way He will hide me in the shelter of His love and He will sustain me.
Most of the times the things we fear are things we can’t control. What we can control is where we put our trust and what we allow our minds to dwell on. When we put our trust in the one who is our light and our salvation fear can and will disappear.
Praying for you today, friends, that you will take the step to replace fear with trust and walk in peace!
Psalm 27:1 The LORD is my light and my salvation–whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life–of whom shall I be afraid?